Every time I see someone playing Farmville a little smile creeps into my lips. Maybe more of a smirk. Then I look up the left, my smirk becomes a full blown smile and I think…of ways to kill that person.
It doesn’t bother me people are “wasting their lives” playing a game. I spent my entire 20s wasting my life. Now, granted, I almost went pro in Soldiers of Fortune 2 (SoF2) – so bad example. It’s just, it’s insulting to technology to play Farmville. It’s sort of like being Amish. You could go to the store and buy butter for a $1 or you can spend 7 days churning it yourself. The Amish are borderline retarded. They’re also not offended by that because they don’t have electricity let alone the internetz.
Playing Farmville on a PC is like using a calculator to add 1+1. You understand of course, that the PC you’re using is 1,000 times more sophisticated than the computers used to put the first man on the moon.
Farmville has one useful purpose on Facebook: to identify the friends you need to defriend.
I interviewed a Farmville player who’s identify will remain a secret and herein referred to as tnuA yhtaK.
Jason: Why do you play Farmville?
tnuA yhtaK: One, it’s relieves stress and secondly it’s addicting.Jason: Cocaine also relieves stress and is addiciting. Do you do crack?
tnuA yhtaK: No, it’s not free.Jason: So, you would do crack – if it were free?
tnuA yhtaK: What’s this for, Jason?
Jason: Just answer.
tnuA yhtaK: No?
Jason: “No” to doing crack or “No” you won’t answer?
tnuA yhtaK: Hey, it’s your Mom’s birthday on Friday.
Jason: Seriously, you’re running my interview.Jason: So, you don’t play Farmville because it’s fun then?
tnuA yhtaK: No, it’s not fun. I just want the biggest and best farm.
Jason: Wow, that’s strikingly similar to what Hitler said.Jason: If I gave you $20 would you stop playing Farmville?
tnuA yhtaK: No way.
Jason: Well, if you send me another baby elephant or cow I will defriend you even if you are my Godmother, Aunt Kathy.
(Reminder: Enter the caption contest here to win a $10 iTunes gift card.)
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Um, as counsel, plz ceasties and desistsies all negative talk about my client. Thx.
You can block all farmville related crap from your page, but you’re a glutton for punishment. You LIKE having your wall covered with farmville, you sick masochistic bastard.