And I want it.
Awhile back a dude created a Facebook group that said if 1,000,000 people joined the group his girlfriend would let him turn their house into a pirate ship. It was funny. I joined and eventually over 1,000,000 people joined. But now he’s all like Oh, I don’t have enough money lol.
In clear, pirate terms, this douche-bag agreed to “turn [his] house” into a pirate ship. But he hasn’t even started and instead launched a website asking for donations. Whoa, whoa, whoa! That wasn’t the agreement. What kind of scam is this guy running? I ask for donations, but at least I’m upfront and providing you with entertainment. Nowhere did Captain Liar say he didn’t have the money or that we would also need to fund it. What kind of pirate needs a pirate ship house who also doesn’t have plundered loot or buried treasure lying around? Worst. Pirate. Ever.
Wait til you get a load of how much this guy wants before he’ll begin building. Your average American house probably costs about $100,000. Swashbuckler Pinocchio wants $1.5 million! He says he wants to do it “properly”. I don’t give a fuck about properly. He can go to the hardware store and buy some boards, paint and a couple bed sheets as masts for all I care. If he’s so broke maybe he should’ve saved the $50 he just spent on a web domain and hosting fees.
Basically, this guy wants us to make him a millionaire for one funny comment he made 3 years ago. I’d rather, of course, people made me a millionaire. I’ve been making funny comments in AOL teen chat rooms since ‘94. I want to create another group on Facebook called “You owe us a pirate ship house NOW BUILD IT!”. When 1,000,000 people join I’ll pretend it wasn’t a secret business model and ask for $1 each.
(EDIT: I actually just discovered such a group exists. It’s called “If the Pirate Ship House guy doesn’t follow through with his plans, I’m going to be angry”.)
What would happen, if theoretically, we all donated money and he reached his goal? Firstly, he would be a millionaire and we would all be dumb. Secondly, he probably wouldn’t even build the house – he’d find another way to back out. He’d probably just move to Vegas, invest in Glenn Beck’s gold company, do copious amounts of crack with former MTV Real World/Road Rules Challenge cast members and gamble the rest away on WWE matches. There is just no accountability on the internet. Well, not since I used to pretend to be a 16/f/ca on AOL.
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Well said!!!…….What a looser.